The nurse had been kind enough bring Joe some pain-killers for his injuries. Joe happily gulped them down and looked at Mali, who had just caught Joe up on the strange circumstances surrounding their sudden finacial fortune.
"So there's someone following us and listening to us tell our stories?" Joe asked. Mali nodded. "And this person gave us $5,000 just because?" he continued. She nodded again.
"Well, that's fucking weird," he replied, rubbing his ribs, waiting patiently for the meds to kick in. "We need to get the fuck out of this state."
"Where should we go next? Wyoming? Colorado? Oh! How about Nebraska?" Mali excitedly pondered.
Joe gave her an amused expression. "We'll figure that out once we get on the road."
Mali produced the die from her pockets and threw it gingerly onto the sticky hospital floor. Joe could not see what the result was from atop of his hospital bed and watched as she stared down at the die.
"It's a four," she told him. "I've got a good one."
It was before they had names, but the States were not getting along. Mississippi had fallen in love with Missouri, but Tennessee and Arkansas were always in the way. New York was desperately looking for a new location away from noisy Pennsylvania, and their bickering kept all of New England awake at night. Florida was hanging out with Mexico, causing a rift between Georgia and Alabama. And Indiana, Ohio, and Illinois kept making fun of how damp Michigan was as of late. Texas just kept eating.
But wise Canada watched them all like a mother, and listened to their problems. She never judged them, and was as fair as she could possibly be.
It was when Iowa was mysteriously blindsided by a mystery location, Canada had had enough.
"From now on, you will all stay in your respective borders and not bother each other anymore!" she exclaimed. The States shook in their foundations. "You're all lucky I'm still here for you! You're all a bunch of spoiled, over-dramatic whiners!"
Idaho began to cry.
"Great job!" South Dakota yelled at the mother-land. "Now you've done it!"
Mississippi began to sing a breathy love song to Missouri. New York and Pennsylvania resumed their bickering. Louisiana complained loudly of all the hurricanes. Montana blared it's country music to drown out the others, only causing surrounding territories to boost their volume as well.
"THAT'S IT! I'M DONE! YOU'RE ALL ON YOUR OWN!" Canada told them all.
They paused for a second to wonder the ramifications, but then continued their respective battles.
Ever since then, Canada has wanted nothing to do with the States.
Then the humans came.
"Mali, this might be the pills talking, but that was a great story," Joe replied.